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Once We Turn 40, We Can No Longer Tolerate Narcissism and Manipulation

By Nadica | Inspiration

Sep 24

Most people can say that they are a people-pleaser. Most of us do not make waves; we just go with the flow. However, we can also say that we have been breaking our own hearts by doing that.

But one day it all changed. You see, the turning point is at the moment when we have 40 candles on our birthday cake. There is some shift and significant change.

When you turn 40 something begins to stir in your guts. What happens is that the caterpillar finally turns into a beautiful butterfly. You begin to will fine with uncovering what was always inside you.

We begin to realize that maybe, just maybe we have been hiding from everyone else and holding back. You start to accept the fact that not everything revolves around you and that people simply do not care as much as we believe they do.

We do not spend half an hour deciding on whether to post that photo on Facebook because someone might say something or think less of us. You see, now we understand that people do not care that much, and if they do care, we don’t care.

That is one amazing feeling. Now, we do not need to compare with others. We accept ourselves, and we like us. Who has the time for comparing? We are 40!

We understand that we aren’t the skinniest, youngest and hottest, but that is completely fine. The difference now is the fact that we do not care.

We have other priorities now, and we do not have time to be jealous of that woman who has great legs.

Also, we are completely aware that regardless of what happens, everything will be fine. We have been through a lot of things, and we are proud of it, we have done it all by ourselves. We now know that we will accept nothing less than respect.

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We no longer have the patience for manipulation and narcissism, we value our time, and we do not want to spend a second around such people.

Our family and friends are what matters; now it matters even more than ever before. And no, it is not because we are older, but because finally, our priorities are the right ones.

We, as women, have had many experiences and now we understand that what is important in this short life we live is to love people around us.

Now we have a bigger need than before, to say to our family and closest friends just how much we value them and they mean to us. Why? Because certainly by now we have been through a loss.

We understand that time is precious and that every single moment with them matters. Now, we clearly know that 99 percent of the things we always worry about will not happen.

Surely it has happened at least once to find yourself obsessing about something. Now we know, worrying is pointless and even if something happens, it is out of our control. You cannot control everything.

Why waste a day worrying about things that might never happen? No matter how much we worry or think about it, we cannot prevent things. We are still going to have melt-downs, but not so traumatic as when we were 20.

One thing is certain when you are 40; you won’t settle for less than you deserve. Surely, at least once if not more, you have given your heart to someone who didn’t deserve it. However, that was a lesson we had to go through, and now we know better.

From now on, we are the ones who make a choice. We do not need attention from men; we need more. Sometimes all a woman needs is a nail polish, lipstick and high heels.

Every single person goes through a phase where we do not feel that great about ourselves. How do women feel better? When we doll up even when we do not feel like it.

We know that we do that so that we can seize that day. Now that we are 40, we know what to really laugh at ourselves.

The idols we had, changed. We no longer look up to some celebrities. We want to be who we are; we do not worry about whether some days we do not put any makeup, or we are in that old dress.

We accept ourselves as we are, we love our tummy, thighs, and arms as they are. That is who we are. They are our tummy, arms and thighs and of course we are going to love them.

What matters to us is to stay true to ourselves. One day we might want to doll up, others we might choose not to, and that is fine because we are the ones that matter. We no longer worry about what others might say when they see us.

We like who we see in the mirror, everything we need is standing right in front of us in that mirror. This doesn’t happen overnight, but eventually, it does. Yes, we might have wrinkles, but that means we have lived.

And we are cool with that. In a way 40 makes us stronger. We can look at all our gains and losses, and we can just appreciate them, they made us who we are right at this moment.

Finally, we are getting to know who we truly are at heart. And you know what, we love ourselves. We are 40, and we rock!